The 5 most offensive Christmas songs ever | Rock Candy

There is a debate roiling the nation.

Should “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” be banned?

On one side, there are people who think the song is uncomfortable, considering it sounds like a man trying to convince a woman to stay at his house and she wonders aloud what’s in her drink.

On the other, there are those who posit that the song is from another time when a woman had to make excuses (“it’s cold outside,” “my mother will start to worry,” “my sister will be suspicious,” etc.) rather than just decide herself to stay the night with a man.

But that’s far from the most offensive Christmas song ever.

There are others. It’s amazing many of these ever got published.

“The Night Santa Went Crazy,” Weird Al Yankovic

Santa has something of a mental breakdown and destroys the North Pole, holding hostages and murdering the reindeer. Santa participating in mass murder (even of fictional reindeer and elves) is horrifying, not hilarious.

“Do They Know It’s Christmas,” Band Aid While it was well-intentioned, the entire song is patronizing. There is, in fact, snow in Africa. (It’s a massive continent with all kinds of climates.) There are, in fact, Christians in Africa. (Big surprise there.) And the line “Well tonight thank God it’s them/Instead of you”? Real nice.

“Merry (Expletive) Christmas,” Mr. Garrison (from “South Park”) Back in the day, “South Park” released a lot of albums. One of them was “Mr. Hankey’s Christmas Classics,” starring the anthropomorphic poop Mr. Hankey. Then there’s this gem, about traveling around the world and wishing people of various religions an expletive-filled Christmas. It’s amazing this made it to air.

“(Expletive) Christmas,” Eric Idle Those Christmas traditions you know and love? This member of Monty Python has a choice expletive for every single one of them.

“Coming For Christmas,” TVX Babes If you think “Back Door Santa” is bad, I have something for you. Performed by the stars of adult channel Television X, this song has double entendrés on top of double entendrés. (Quadruple entendrés?) There’s not much of a mystery as to what they’re singing about.

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